Oral Sex Is The New Goodnight Kiss

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 A Solution

We are living in the most toxic time in our history. It is a fantasy to think that we can control or restrict our teenage daughters’ exposure to our hypersexualized culture.

That is not my intent.

This is not about confronting your daughter about her sexual activity, friends, or behavior, which you would probably consider shocking.   But I want you to know what she and her friends are doing.

This is also not about your family going through a difficult time.

There are no counselors for this. There is no group therapy.  Her school is not equipped to handle it.  Most are in denial.  

This is about identifying and stopping a devastating event that will change your lives forever. 

The simple fact is:  There are girls in your daughter’s middle-class school right now, who could be her best friend, who may be seducing her into sex trade.

Through the eyes of mothers and daughters who have been there, I want to show you how it happens.

I want to help you keep your daughter safe.

Exposure and Expectations:  The Internet Has Accelerated the Normal Sex Cycle

Fifteen years ago, if a girl wanted to learn more about horses, she would go to the library and find  pictures of horses in meadows.  Today, if you type “horse” and “girl” in Google, the first hit is: “American girl licks hung horse dick”.

Ø  This is the new media:  exposure directly affects teenage behavior

Ø  Prior to the Internet, community standards of sexuality regulated behavior, with normal deviations.  The exposure today is a global one, and instant.  This in effect is the effect of mutation on an environment causing rapid change.

Ø  When Britney Spears goes out without underwear, your daughter will instantly see her online (or on her phone) and so will her peers

Ø  She has seen the partially nude photos of Miley Cyrus in Vanity Fair 

Ø  She knows Lindsay Lohan is partying with older men, using drugs, in rehab

Ø  She has seen the nude photo of "High School Musical" star Vanessa Hudgens  

Ø  She has seen the sex tape that catapulted Paris Hilton to worldwide fame.   

 

Ø  The new sexuality standard is created.

 

  Acceleration from all Sources:  Art Imitates Life Imitates Art

The writers of popular teenager television programming follow the Internet closely:  their shows need to be on the cutting edge, and then each week need to surpass that point.

Ø  Your daughter who may not yet have kissed a boy has probably seen a threesome, girl on girl kissing (Madonna, Britney and girl group Ta’tu) and alcohol and drug use on Gossip Girl where there are no consequences and no interference;

Ø  The writers of Gossip Girl are watching TMZ, following blogs, and now need to escalate the current teenage sexual behavior to remain cutting edge;

Ø  “Mind-blowingly inappropriate”. An ad the network is using to promote Gossip Girl and play to teens.

 

Red Flags Begin to Emerge

“When I’d act all crazy all these guys would be looking at me. It’s like all this attention is on you. You’re on fire,” Julia, 15.

Ø  If your daughter is dating an older boy, her sexual exploration will accelerate to keep him interested. This will include: sending him nude photos (sexting), giving oral sex to his buddy(ies) to prove her devotion, having sex on a dare, experimenting with GHB and Ecstasy.

Ø  “When I was 13, I met Mike. We would leave school like 3 times a day to have sex.”  Vicky.

Ø  “I began to associate my own personal power with giving a man pleasure… I didn’t know I had so much power,” Heather

Ø  You will notice a change in her behavior, clothing, friends.

Ø  “She’d come home with new clothes, piercings, eyebrows waxed. Money I didn’t give her,” Angie (Lauren’s mom).

Ø  You are now at the tipping point where you will lose your daughter if you don’t act fast.

 

PART II:

Crossing the Tipping Point:  Where trading sex begins

 

The slide into trading sex for luxury goods, money, attention

“These are the prettiest girls from the most successful families – loving nurturing families – bored, young ladies” Sue Howard, counselor.

“I got another call similar to the Luu Dang investigation [one of the largest high school prostitution rings uncovered] a mother called to say her daughter was being picked up at all hours of the day, by different men. She’s got money. This family is well off, prominent in the community. This is the door to a whole new investigation,” Det. Randy Wickins.

 

Warning:  There’s a New Predator at her School

Ø  “They’d [older men she was partying with] ask me to bring some girls for them. So I’d tell all these girls at school, ‘I know some older guys. They want to buy us drinks. Do you want to go’ And they would. At 13, going to a bar with an older guy is like everybody wants to do that,” Courtney, (a popular girl at her school who recruited 20 to 30 girls).

Ø  “The youngest girl I’ve recruited was probably 10 or 11. I’d just bring in all these stupid little girls.” Leigha, 14, (she recruited 40 girls).

Ø  “The guys buy you whatever you want – clothes, jewelry, a new phone. If you’re going to have sex anyway…you may as well get something for it,” Vicky, 15.

Ø  “Yeah, I’d get a lot of offers, ‘take off your shirt, I’ll give you 20 bucks,’ ‘Do a strip tease up on the table, I’ll give you 100 bucks,’ so that happened a lot,” Courtney, 13.

Ø  “At McDonalds, I’ve worked there for 9 months and I’m still only making 6 bucks. I have the biggest brand fetish. I love Roxy clothes. I spend so much money shopping. I spent $400 in like 5 minutes. I can make that in 30 minutes having sex with 3 or 4 guys. So I do,” explains Terry, 16.  “I have to keep working at McDonalds or my mom will get suspicious,” she adds.


What You Can Do:

The girls I have met who have been lured into trading sex with boys and men are among the sweetest. In many ways, they are easy to exploit because they are so trusting. Even if you do not believe your daughter could be sexually bullied or victimized in any way, it is necessary to educate yourself about the hypersexualized culture, in order to insulate your daughter against it.

One of your jobs as a parent is to socialize your daughter into the culture, but what are you supposed to do when the culture is toxic?

Ø  Develop a list of expectations for her around relationships. The basis of the “hooking up” culture is that there will be no relationship. Your daughter needs to know that a healthy relationship includes: friendship, trust, respect and love.

Ø  If your young daughter is online. You must know her passwords for all of the chat services she uses. You can also look at the saved chats on her computer. You are not invading her privacy. It is your job to ensure that she is not being solicited for sex.

Ø  Girls are bombarded with the “slut” image. The culture teaches them that their value lies primarily in their bodies and in their skill at attracting male attention. Girls quickly learn the kinds of roles, attitudes, and positions for which they are expected to train:  Stripper, “Hooters Girl in Training”, “Porn Star in Training”, “Implants – who needs brains”.  Teach your daughter to be critical of the media and its portrayal of girls and women.If your daughter does not look at these images with a critical eye, she will admire them. If she admires them, she will be more likely to emulate them.

Ø  Start Young: Images and products sold to young girls reinforce the idea that girls are intended for sexual consumption: Disney’s sexualized female characters; Bratz dolls; Bratz Books (The copy from one reads: “this Bratz book enlightens six-year-old girls on such topics as luscious lips, designing one’s own sexy skirt, and being an irresistible flirt”). 

Ø  Pay attention to your daughter. If she does not get enough of your attention she will seek attention elsewhere. The attention from boys comes with a price. “The boys will follow them around, ‘Come on, you’re so beautiful, just give me a blow job,’ explains Joy Becker, a counselor. “We’ve had girls give blow jobs in school bathrooms with urine on the floor,” she adds.          

Copyright (2009) Sharlene Azam  All Rights Reserved.
Please feel free to duplicate or distribute this file as long as the contents have not been changed and this copyright notice is intact. Thank you.



Stories in the news about teen prostitution:

Two Arizona Teens Ran Prostitution Ring, Police Say

Tuesday , February 24
, 2009   Two teenaged girls were arrested for allegedly pimping other students for prostitution, Phoenix police said. The girls, both 16, allegedly used contacts from local schools and their friends to lure other young girls into prostitution, MyFOXPhoenix reported. Investigators said the suspects recruited at least five girls, ages 14 to 17. Finley and Tye, who were allegedly involved in prostitution themselves, were responsible for recruiting, teaching and receiving money from the other girls who worked for them, police said. At one point, the two rented an apartment where they conducted the prostitution operation, according to investigators. The Phoenix Police Vice Unit began investigating when patrol officers gave detectives information on child prostitutes working the west Phoenix area. The teens were charged with multiple counts of child prostitution, pandering and receiving the earnings of a prostitute, MyFOXPhoenix reported. Police said there may be additional arrests as they continue the investigation. Click here to read more on this story from MyFOXPhoenix.com.

 

FBI, police rescue child prostitutes around USBy DEVLIN BARRETT, Associated Press Writer Devlin Barrett, Associated Press Writer Mon Feb 23, 3:33 am ET WASHINGTON – The FBI has rescued more than 45 suspected teenage prostitutes, some as young as 13, in a nationwide sweep to remove kids from the illegal sex trade and punish their accused pimps.Over a three-night initiative called Operation Cross Country, federal agents working with local law enforcement also arrested more than 50 alleged pimps, according to preliminary bureau data.The teenage prostitutes found in the investigation ranged in age from 13 to 17.Historically, federal authorities rarely play a role in anti-prostitution crackdowns, but the FBI is becoming more involved as it tries to rescue children caught up in the business."The goal is to recover kids. We consider them the child victims of prostitution," said FBI Deputy Assistant Director Daniel Roberts."Unfortunately, the vast majority of these kids are what they term 'throwaway kids,' with no family support, no friends. They're kids that nobody wants, they're loners. Many are runaways," Roberts said.Most of the children are put into the custody of local child protection agencies.Agents in cities from Miami to Chicago to Anchorage, Alaska took part in the operation.The federal effort is also designed to hit pimps with much tougher prison sentences than they would likely get in state criminal courts.Government prosecutors look to bring racketeering charges or conspiracy charges that can result in decades of jail time."Some of these networks of pimps and their organizations are very sophisticated, they're interstate," said Roberts, requiring wiretaps and undercover sting operations to bring charges.The weekend's roundup marked the third such Operation Cross Country, and is part of a broader federal program launched in 2003 to crack down on the sexual exploitation of children.

 

FBI, police rescue child prostitutes around USBy DEVLIN BARRETT, Associated Press Writer Devlin Barrett, Associated Press Writer Mon Feb 23, 3:33 am ET WASHINGTON – The FBI has rescued more than 45 suspected teenage prostitutes, some as young as 13, in a nationwide sweep to remove kids from the illegal sex trade and punish their accused pimps.Over a three-night initiative called Operation Cross Country, federal agents working with local law enforcement also arrested more than 50 alleged pimps, according to preliminary bureau data.The teenage prostitutes found in the investigation ranged in age from 13 to 17.Historically, federal authorities rarely play a role in anti-prostitution crackdowns, but the FBI is becoming more involved as it tries to rescue children caught up in the business."The goal is to recover kids. We consider them the child victims of prostitution," said FBI Deputy Assistant Director Daniel Roberts."Unfortunately, the vast majority of these kids are what they term 'throwaway kids,' with no family support, no friends. They're kids that nobody wants, they're loners. Many are runaways," Roberts said.Most of the children are put into the custody of local child protection agencies.Agents in cities from Miami to Chicago to Anchorage, Alaska took part in the operation.The federal effort is also designed to hit pimps with much tougher prison sentences than they would likely get in state criminal courts.Government prosecutors look to bring racketeering charges or conspiracy charges that can result in decades of jail time."Some of these networks of pimps and their organizations are very sophisticated, they're interstate," said Roberts, requiring wiretaps and undercover sting operations to bring charges.The weekend's roundup marked the third such Operation Cross Country, and is part of a broader federal program launched in 2003 to crack down on the sexual exploitation of children.

 

Police: Teen pimp lures girls into illegal sex  
11:15 AM CDT on Tuesday, March 25, 2008
By REBECCA LOPEZ / WFAA-TV 
 
Rebecca Lopez reports  
March 24, 2008  

NEWS 8 EXCLUSIVE  

DALLAS — She's just 13 years old, a middle-schooler who is now facing charges involving a serious crime.  

Police arrested the girl at a local nightclub where she was allegedly bringing other young girls to dance and to serve as prostitutes.  

Investigators said the 13-year-old lured other girls to Club Metropolis, enticing them with the promise of money and even forcing some of them to dance and sell their bodies for sex.  

"It's a really horrendous affair," said Dallas police Lt. Chess Williams.  

Police estimate there are hundreds of teenage prostitutes on the streets of Dallas because there is a big demand. Recently, they found a 12-year-old girl dancing naked at a nightclub.  

"I can't believe that a 13-, 14-, 15-year-old child knowlingly injects herself into a world of prostitution," Lt. Williams said.  

But it did happen, and the 13-year-old in this case may have talked another school friend into prostitution.  

Police won't say what school the girl attended, but they're not surprised. "One of the remarkable things we learned through all of this is there's a tremendous amount of money in all this, so a huge demand for young girls in prostitution world," Lt. Williams said.  

Police said the young girls aren't acting alone. They say some of the same people who are pimping out the adult prostitutes are the same ones exploiting young girls.  

The 13-year-old was arrested on Saturday, March 22, and charged with compelling prostitution. She and others like her may be runaways whose childhoods were stolen for profit.  


http://www.wfaa.com/sharedcontent/dws/wfaa/latestnews/stories/wfaa080115_mo_prostitutionring.26aceba5.html#
Teens in alleged prostitution ring face FW judge06:36 PM CST on Tuesday, January 15, 2008By DARLA MILES / WFAA-TV WFAA-TV Also Online 8/14: 3 teens accused of heading FW prostitution ring FORT WORTH - Accompanied by their parents, three teens accused of prostituting fellow teens in Fort Worth stood before a judge Tuesday. The teens are being held at the Kimbo Juvenile Detention Center in Fort Worth. Prosecutors said since it was an adult crime, the alleged ringleaders, who are charged with human trafficking, should face adult penalties. Blanca Saravia said she headed to court Tuesday hoping a judge would let her daughter out of jail, which didn't happen. "It's not fair," she said. "My daughter arrested, it's completely not fair." Police call Saravia's 15-year-old daughter the "enforcer" of a violent teen prostitution ring. She and two other teens were arrested on Monday. Investigators said the teens are part of the Varrio Central gang, who allegedly beat and gang-raped runaway teenage girls until they agreed to become prostitutes. They also allegedly sold the girls for sex at a Fort Worth apartment complex for $60. Saravia said she admits her daughter has run into trouble and also has some emotional problems, but said the police arrested the wrong girl. "Her, no, she did absolutely nothing, nothing," Saravia said. "If she did, the school or I would know." Two weeks ago, Diego Rodriquez, Martin Reyes and two other teens were arrested for allegedly selling a 14-year-old girl to a 56-year-old store owner, Chang Lee. Investigators said the teens have been running the prostitution ring for two years; and some teens may face charges as adults. "To take underage girls, as the allegations are, and force them to engage in prostitution, that's a lot," said Tim Bernarnez, Tarrant County assistant district attorney. "That's far, far different than kids just being kids and doing stupid things. That demonstrates a level of sophistication, and quite honestly, a level of evil." Police said the investigation is not over, and they believe there may be more victims.